Freemasons Saved my Life

One of the common questions I hear from people are how and why did you join Freemasonry. I thought I might share my own reasons as they may be unusual and may offer a little light to people who find themselves in the position I was in before joining the craft.

I have always been intrigued by freemasons as long as I can remember. When I was sixteen and at catering college I worked in the kitchen one evening and was so keen to see what the guys at the lodge were up to but never found out. I just thought people like me; ‘ordinary’ people were never allowed to be masons.

Three years ago my own brother let me know that he had been a freemason for four years without me even knowing (we had not been exceptionally close up until then), in fact he was junior warden at the time.

I told him I was interested in joining because I had seen a positive change in him during his time in the lodge but I just thought he had simply “found religion”. He used to be ruled by money and material things but I suddenly saw a more giving side to him and I could see what a nice guy he had become, I just didn’t know why.

He agreed I should join his lodge as he felt I would make an ideal mason due to my outlook on life.

It seemed so perfect to me as at the time and this is were my story might become clearer to you all.

At that point in my life I had been off work for over three years due to suffering depression and having to quit my successful, well paid but stressful job. Since being unemployed I had suffered from agoraphobia and social phobias and found it extremely difficult to go out in public, in fact I NEVER answered my own front door or even the telephone – I was a prisoner in my own home. I had zero, and I mean zero, confidence.

I had reached the point where I could not carry on any longer and had to find a way out of this trap I was in but could not see how.

Masonry gave me what the doctors, drugs and councillors couldn’t. I had the support of my wife and my brother and joined the lodge. Okay, I had to force myself to go through the initiation but I actually enjoyed it as I enjoyed my second and third although I suffered a panic attack which meant the five points of fellowship must have been like hugging a sweaty haddock for the poor brother involved. But thanks to being able to see more of my brother as well as me new brothers I was able to attend meetings with no pressure and make friends at my own pace.

My confidence grew (I still get the odd mild panic attack at very nervous times at the lodge) but attending the lodge helped me live something approaching normality again.

Now I am off all my medications for depression and panic attacks, I was even able to quit smoking without a problem. I now have a full time job I feel I am very good at and love, I live a normal life, my marriage is so happier and stress free without my poor wife and kids having a depressive in the house and my social life has never been better plus I see more of my brother than ever before and my other brother recently joined a lodge of his own so I see more of him too.

Now after two years in the craft I am now lodge secretary in my lodge and although it is tough standing up at meetings to read minutes etc. it is getting better and nobody notices too much. The last time I had a panic attack was in January when I had to read in open lodge for the first time at the installation of the new master who, fittingly enough was my own brother. I had the attack but doing it was so important to me I got through it and with every meeting it gets easier.

I am now looking at learning the third degree tracing board as well as designing my own lectures. It is difficult but I have to stretch myself to increase my confidence.

So that is why I joined masonry and why I love the fraternity and my brothers so much – Masonry and masons saved my life and when people ask what freemasonry has given me I can honestly say, “EVERYTHING I HAVE!”

Author	Message
ifwg	Posted 30/09/2009 21:03:30
Apprentice Group: Forum Member Last Active: 22/11/2010 19:14:03 Posts: 35, Visits: 46 190	One of the common questions I hear from people are how and why did you join Freemasonry. I thought I might share my own reasons as they may be unusual and may offer a little light to people who find themselves in the position I was in before joining the craft. I have always been intrigued by freemasons as long as I can remember. When I was sixteen and at catering college I worked in the kitchen one evening and was so keen to see what the guys at the lodge were up to but never found out. I just thought people like me; ‘ordinary’ people were never allowed to be masons. Three years ago my own brother let me know that he had been a freemason for four years without me even knowing (we had not been exceptionally close up until then), in fact he was junior warden at the time. I told him I was interested in joining because I had seen a positive change in him during his time in the lodge but I just thought he had simply “found religion”. He used to be ruled by money and material things but I suddenly saw a more giving side to him and I could see what a nice guy he had become, I just didn’t know why. He agreed I should join his lodge as he felt I would make an ideal mason due to my outlook on life. It seemed so perfect to me as at the time and this is were my story might become clearer to you all. At that point in my life I had been off work for over three years due to suffering depression and having to quit my successful, well paid but stressful job. Since being unemployed I had suffered from agoraphobia and social phobias and found it extremely difficult to go out in public, in fact I NEVER answered my own front door or even the telephone – I was a prisoner in my own home. I had zero, and I mean zero, confidence. I had reached the point where I could not carry on any longer and had to find a way out of this trap I was in but could not see how. Masonry gave me what the doctors, drugs and councillors couldn’t. I had the support of my wife and my brother and joined the lodge. Okay, I had to force myself to go through the initiation but I actually enjoyed it as I enjoyed my second and third although I suffered a panic attack which meant the five points of fellowship must have been like hugging a sweaty haddock for the poor brother involved. But thanks to being able to see more of my brother as well as me new brothers I was able to attend meetings with no pressure and make friends at my own pace. My confidence grew (I still get the odd mild panic attack at very nervous times at the lodge) but attending the lodge helped me live something approaching normality again. Now I am off all my medications for depression and panic attacks, I was even able to quit smoking without a problem. I now have a full time job I feel I am very good at and love, I live a normal life, my marriage is so happier and stress free without my poor wife and kids having a depressive in the house and my social life has never been better plus I see more of my brother than ever before and my other brother recently joined a lodge of his own so I see more of him too. Now after two years in the craft I am now lodge secretary in my lodge and although it is tough standing up at meetings to read minutes etc. it is getting better and nobody notices too much. The last time I had a panic attack was in January when I had to read in open lodge for the first time at the installation of the new master who, fittingly enough was my own brother. I had the attack but doing it was so important to me I got through it and with every meeting it gets easier. I am now looking at learning the third degree tracing board as well as designing my own lectures. It is difficult but I have to stretch myself to increase my confidence. So that is why I joined masonry and why I love the fraternity and my brothers so much – Masonry and masons saved my life and when people ask what freemasonry has given me I can honestly say, “EVERYTHING I HAVE!” Bro. Colin Lawson Secretary of Tyne-Castle Lodge 6317 UGLE -Province of Northumberland Visit our lodge at www.tynecastlelodge.org.uk
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lauderdale	Posted 01/10/2009 00:31:48
Past Master Group: Forum Member Last Active: 10/07/2011 06:43:06 Posts: 2,122, Visits: 4,278 5,026	Bro Colin, this is truly a beautiful account of how Freemasonry can help someone in time of need. I commend it to the perusal of others.
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Nosameerf	Posted 01/10/2009 00:35:45
Master Group: Forum Member Last Active: 08/10/2011 14:42:49 Posts: 431, Visits: 9,411 1,373	Well done Colin! This a heart warming story. I was in a bad mood but reading this cheered me up. :D Strength of manhood and beauty of spirit need combination. Masonry thus needs strength with gracefulness, stability with courtesy, and firmness with gentleness. Sapere aude; incipe!
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chestnut	Posted 01/10/2009 06:40:56
Past Master Group: Forum Member Last Active: Yesterday @ 18:49:07 Posts: 1,131, Visits: 5,902 4,296	How wonderfull. FM can be an inspiration or assistance on so mnay different levels. It is a shame that some can not see past the trappings and concentrate more on the message. David
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wayne cowley	Posted 01/10/2009 08:03:23
Journeyman Group: Forum Member Last Active: Yesterday @ 12:54:26 Posts: 1,065, Visits: 2,421 2,978	A very wonderful and moving account I trust you will continue to get much from the Craft Wayne PM Hamlet of Van Lodge 8334 UGLE (Caerphilly - South Wales) H Hamlet of Van Chapter 8334 WM, Caerffili MMM 1348 PCN, Caerffili RAM 1348 St Teilo Chapter A&AR 789 Brangwyn SRIA 75 Castell Caerffili OSM 466 Fforest KT 582: Merthyr Tydfil R&SM 120, Penychen - Athelstan 53, RCC 295 KTP 100 OSC 21 TI
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sojourner	Posted 01/10/2009 14:12:45
Past Master Group: Forum Member Last Active: Yesterday @ 16:17:35 Posts: 950, Visits: 7,696 4,459	Dear Bro. Colin, A truely inspirational account. I wish you every success and happines. If ever you decide to join other orders, I would highly recommend the Mark degree first. A lovely degree which I'm sure your personal circumstances would make especially meaningful. Best fraternal wishes, :) Roy L. "SELUME PROFERRE"
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dp	Posted 01/10/2009 14:12:48
Journeyman Group: Forum Member Last Active: 01/05/2012 09:46:34 Posts: 1,079, Visits: 3,071 2,553	Thank you Colin for sharing that wonderful story with us. I am so glad that you are happy and well and all is good for you. S&F, Dave...
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Mike Martin	Posted 01/10/2009 19:19:32
Apprentice Group: Administrator Last Active: 39 minutes ago Posts: 2,548, Visits: 12,959 12,584	Colin, That's a lovely insight and thank you for sharing. It reinforces what I always say, ask a thousand Freemasons what Freemasonry means to them and you'll get a thousand different answers. Mike Mersey Lodge No. 5434 Website The Freemasons'''' Grand Charity Website See my BALLS here
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Brother_TJ	Posted 02/10/2009 16:41:27
Fellow Group: Forum Member Last Active: 17/01/2012 00:42:17 Posts: 247, Visits: 376 642	Thank you Brother for your story, inspiring. .·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·.·. Amethyst Lodge No. 2, Orient of Tulsa, Oklahoma and Isis Lodge No. 3, Orient of Oklahoma City, Oklahoma...A.F.H.R.
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Bob Butler	Posted 02/10/2009 22:07:00
Apprentice Group: Forum Member Last Active: 28/01/2012 21:09:10 Posts: 78, Visits: 224 178	Thank you for sharing your experience with us when you hear a story such as yours it puts into perspective some of the silly little disagreements we have on this site about who does this the best or longest etc all the very best for the future bob
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